The Beauty of Masculinity

For many, masculinity has become a dirty word. It shares connotations with macho, and calls to mind images of loud, brash individuals engaging in rash or aggressive behavior.

Given the realities of human interaction and attraction, however, this is simply not fair. Outside of these negative stereotypes, masculinity simply means exhibiting the personality traits typically associated with the male gender. While most have pretty much agreed to embrace the ideas that gender is a construct created by society, and there is no real way for the sexes to act, masculine traits can be helpful in shaping and forming a desired gender identity. For example, a cisgender or trans male may take pride in having a well-groomed beard, embracing “male” fashion trends, or lifting weights to maintain a more male-looking physique.

And men aren’t alone in this feeling of shame. Women are often faced with the same quandary.

Those who identify as female and embrace feminine fashion or beauty standards are often chided that shaving their legs, wearing dresses, or spending time on beauty concerns like hair and makeup simply reinforces negative stereotypes that have held women down since the beginning.

However, the way I see it, expressing your gender identity loudly and proudly if you choose to identify as male or female doesn’t mean you are just buying into what society wants you to do; it’s a great way to feel more yourself and comfortable in your own skin.

And for those who find masculinity attractive, individuals who do things like maintain nice-looking beards or wear sexy scents of male cologne or deodorant are highlighting their sexiness for their partners and loved ones. Even better, because we are finally escaping the gender binary, this no longer has to be limited to cisgender women seeking out and tying down cisgender men. In a variety of sex and gender combinations, as well as non-traditional relationships, the sexiness of masculinity can stand out.

Of course, this does not mean “masculinity” can be used as an excuse for poor behavior. Being aggressive or angry is not a masculine or male thing, although it is true that testosterone can cause these behaviors in some individuals (one of the side-effects trans men often face when undergoing hormone therapy). So it’s important to understand the distinction between biological sex and hormones and gender identity and expression. Having a penis or lots of testosterone might increase the likelihood to exhibit some masculine traits, but this doesn’t mean masculinity can be an excuse for bad behavior. Instead, it should be a way to highlight the goodness and sexiness in an individual.

Long story short, masculinity is beautiful. It’s attractive and appealing to those who crave the masculine romantically and sexually, and it’s a wonderful way to express gender and identity. As long as it isn’t used as a crutch to justify bad behavior, the masculine can be extremely empowering.