Sex, Drugs, and Recovery

Decaying teeth, body sores, erratic and dangerous behavior, the contraction of incurable disease, brain damage, violent withdrawals, and untimely death.

The battle wounds of addiction may look similar for many of its sufferers, but for its LGBT victims, the scars may run all the more deep.

“Rates of addiction are almost twice as high in the LGBT community than in the straight community,” says Steve D’Ascoli, project therapist for the Mile High Recovery project, an addiction recovery group serving gay and bisexual men and run through Mile High Behavioral Healthcare.

The reasons for drug use becoming a chapter of far too many of our stories as an LGBT people is, of course, layered and complex, but much of it boils down to discrimination and self-loathing.

Guy Mauriello, a Denver-based psychotherapist who counts LGBT issues and addiction treatment among his areas of expertise stresses that while he doesn’t want to generalize an entire population, the experience of being LGBT can leave one vulnerable to the possibility of addiction.

“I’m more concerned about the individual, and what they came into life with,” he explains. “We all have a physical and emotional blueprint. And then we add the LGBT layer, and out of that can come the problem of self-hatred. The co-occurring disorders we see, such as depression and addiction, all really boil down to self-hatred.”

And that self-loathing, spurred by a society still not completely affirming of LGBT people, may not only lead to addiction as a way to drown out the loud and frightening noise of hatred, but judgement, by both the self and broader culture, can prolong addiction for LGBT people. The community faces unique obstacles and challenges in seeking out appropriate care.

“You are already vulnerable when seeking treatment, and in the LGBT community, we are so used to being judged. [LGBT people with addiction] need to know they are in a safe environment,” says D’Ascoli.

And a “safe environment,” along with a holistic approach that treats the entire person and does not define a patient by his addiction, is exactly what D’Ascoli’s group aims to provide.

“We offer specific treatment to gay and bisexual males. It is a place where someone can come in and just be himself,” he says. “You are amongst your own peers. They get what you are, what you do, and who you love.”

And while the Mile High Recovery Project is open to any gay or bisexual man wanting to overcome addiction to any substance, D’Ascoli says the most rampant “drug of choice” is crystal meth.

“Gay men can be very sexual to begin with, and meth is a way to keep having sex 24/7,” he says. D’Ascoli notes that ecstasy and GHB are also popular for the same reason.

“Meth is a big one, because it’s associated with the bathhouses” Mauriello adds.

But meth isn’t the only drug plaguing the community.

“There’s more heroin than I have seen in 30 years,” Mauriello shares. “But different personalities are attracted to different drugs. Some people want to float away with heroin, and some want to speed up with meth.”

And for the young members of the LGBT community, some want to stay pretty.

D’Ascoli says he’s witnessed a return to cocaine and alcohol by the younger generation, because they “have seen what meth did to the generation ahead of them.”

Still, addiction and the LGBT community is not hopeless — not by a long shot. Resources that are LGBT-sensitive and aware are increasing in number, and the LGBT community has an extra tool in facing down addiction: strength. Through all of the discrimination and self-denial and hatred, we are capable of being exceptionally strong, resilient, and brave people capable of so much.

“I would like [any LGBT person struggling with addiction] to realize that there is an intelligence within us that wants, and needs, us to succeed,” Mauriello expresses. “I believe we are all here to become better. Always ahead, always forward, and always better.” 

If you or someone you love is struggling with addiction, please contact Mile High Behavioral Healthcare/Mile High Recovery Project at (303) 825-8113 or Guy Mauriello at (303) 370-9311.