GOP Lawmaker Blocks COVID Funds, Says Vaccines Contain Tentacles

With yet another stranger-than-fiction turn in the hellscape that is the modern-day United States, a republican, New Hampshire lawmaker is blocking $27 million in COVID funds, referencing his reasoning in a 52-page report he emailed to colleagues that the vaccines contain “living organism(s) with tentacles” and that the pandemic is a secret plot to control people’s thoughts with 5G.

Unfortunately, yes, this is a news website, and state Representative Kenneth Weyler (R) is really blocking millions in federal COVID-19 aid over truly unhinged conspiracy that seems straight off of a horrifying, QAnon Facebook group comment thread.

The email report claims leaders in the Vatican, London, and D.C. fabricated the pandemic to enforce mind control through 5G via the vaccine, adding, “It’s all one huge puppet theatre, where the majority of the people—even most of those who are complicit—haven’t got the slightest clue what is going on, and how everyone is being played.”

Weyler’s report also claims that “the babies of vaccinated parents are born with pitch black eyes and can stand and even walk at only three months old,” according to his colleague who received the email, state Representative Mary Jane Wallner (D).

(Frankly, those sound like some pretty spooky and festive infants, though the whole thing also sounds very American Horror Story. Last we checked, Ryan Murphy wasn’t hired to write for reality, Season 2021.)

Following the email, Governor Chris Sununu joined other House democrats denouncing the email report and calling for Weyler to be removed from his position over the spread of COVID-19 misinformation.

“I have repeatedly expressed directly to Speaker Packard about the need to remove Weyler from this position of leadership. These latest absurd emails have accelerated the urgency that the Speaker needs to take action,” Sununu says in a statement.

Unfortunately, this isn’t out of the blue, and Weyler has been running his mouth making fantastical statements about the virus and vaccine for some time as he works to block the $27 million in federal vaccine aid for New Hampshire.

He’s accused the New Hampshire Health and Human Services commissioner of lying in reference to the amount of state COVID-19 hospitalizations being nearly all unvaccinated people (he says it’s almost all vaccinated people, though had no source to cite); he told NPR he doesn’t think vaccines work, nor that the CDC is a credible source, and he said on Facebook that doctors are under pressure “from above” to misreport the side effects of the vaccine, though he didn’t indicate who was applying the pressure.

Sounds exactly like the high-quality public servants we want in office, serving the interests of the people (who are still dying in his, and all, states because of the ongoing pandemic).

Republican leaders in the state have, not surprisingly, refused to speak out or take action against Weyler, with republican House Speaker Sherm Packard saying the report was to “share constituent information,” implying the claims about tentacles and black-eyed, walking three-month-old infants was need-to-know for lawmakers.

State democrats denounced Weyler’s claims as dangerous to state residents’ health:

Wallner says in a statement, “The continued dissemination of disinformation on COVID from Representative Weyler is a danger to public health in New Hampshire and to the credibility of the legislature as a whole.”

Might I qualify Wallner’s sentiment with a very exhausted and disheartened: Duh!

Featured image courtesy of Eric Kilby