Create the Wedding of Your Dreams with Tirzah Stein

After working several years as a social worker in the field of trauma and domestic violence, Tirzah Stein was ready for a career transition. It wasn’t until after she was engaged and planned her wedding when the pieces fell into place and the light bulb moment happened.

Born in Boulder and now living in Denver, Stein founded NearlyWed Coaching in 2021, a queer-owned business that offers wedding coaching, premarital coaching, and officiating services. According to Stein, she wants to be the person she wished was around when she and her wife were coordinating their own ceremony.

Navigating the wedding industry, Stein found that not all vendors are inclusive and aware of how to make queer couples feel seen and accepted. Therefore, she started NearlyWed Coaching to change how couples are getting married by providing a support system that focuses on the emotional side of the wedding planning process and affirms and celebrates couples of all identities. Stein has your back and will make sure your special day is unlike any other.

She took some time to talk more about the business with OFM.

Can you begin by telling us more about NearlyWed Coaching and the services you provide?

NearlyWed Coaching is a business founded on the emotional side of planning a wedding. It provides three services that can support the couple and help create an intentional, meaningful, conscious, and authentic wedding. The first service that I started the business with is wedding coaching, which is something that’s very new in the wedding industry. There’s a handful of people doing it, but it’s definitely something that a lot of people don’t know about. I’m kind of on the trailblazing side of this, which is positive, but also has some struggles (laughs).

Basically, wedding coaching is a support system for couples. My wife and I got married in 2018, and we had a wedding planner who was amazing. Wedding planners are needed, but it’s not really their role to get into the social and emotional side of the process. If they have the time and energy, maybe they will, but that’s not really what you’re hiring them to do. They’re the logistical side of everything. I remember wishing we had someone who could support us with everything else, so I felt like this was an opportunity to bring something to the industry.

There are a lot of ideas of what we think a wedding should be and kind of going along with what society or traditions say. When my wife and I got married, we just wanted to get shit done and check things off the list. We didn’t really slow down to think about who we are as a couple, what mattered to us, and how we wanted this wedding to be special for us. We are helping couples navigate through the dynamics that arise when you plan a wedding. My background is in social work, so I’m able to use that skill set to support the couple with the mountain-size pile of things they’re dealing with.

When I read your bio, I saw that you were a licensed social worker. What made you want to transition to the wedding industry?

I spent my entire life being a social worker. That was my identity, and it’s what I put my heart and soul into. A lot of my career was with the Anti-Violence Project in NYC, working with queer folks who experienced all sorts of different violence. Then I worked in domestic violence services, managing one of the biggest shelters in NYC, and then I did similar things in Denver. Honestly, after 10 years of doing that work, I got burnt out. Then COVID happened, and I was like, “I can’t do this anymore.” I hit a point where I knew I wanted to make a big transition in my life, but I didn’t know what it was yet.

The wedding industry was kind of calling me after I got married. Like I said, that’s when some of the ideas for wedding coaching came about, but also, we weren’t always received the way that we would have liked. We dealt with a lot of experiences that many queer couples have gone through. We would talk to someone face-to-face—They knew we were a queer couple; they knew we identified as women, but then they would send us a proposal that would say “bride and groom.” Like, hello! You’re really missing the point. It didn’t make us feel seen, accepted, or validated.

I think another thing that motivated me was, I wanted to create a space for queer folks where they could have a vendor that had a baseline understanding of what we go through: those barriers, the feelings of discrimination, and not being seen. I wanted to create a space where queer folks didn’t have to question that. I also have a product that my sister and I started building many years ago that came from the idea of wedding coaching as well. It’s basically wedding coaching in a box, and it has multiple cards where couples can have conversations around how they want to create a meaningful wedding.

You said there are two other services NearlyWed Coaching provides?

Yes! The second service is premarital coaching, which helps couples not just under the umbrella of the wedding planning process, where they might be having some issues communicating or struggling with decision making, but under the umbrella of their relationship and how to strengthen it. Obviously, a lot of the history of premarital counseling comes from the church or a religious place. Whether a couple identifies as queer or not, they may not feel connected to those services, and that’s where we want to reach out.

It’s been cool to offer something that meets couples where they’re at without it coming from a religious place or pushing a religious agenda. That’s not me at all. I’m the opposite of that, and it’s been great to create a safe space for couples of all identities to feel like they can work through things in their relationship, strengthen their relationship, and navigate a new life together, talk about what marriage means to them and what goals they have. It’s really guided by them. Then the third service that we offer is officiating the wedding.

What would you say has been the most rewarding part about NearlyWed Coaching so far?

I definitely feel like the most rewarding part has been bringing something new that people didn’t realize they needed. When I explain that this is what I do and how wedding coaching can help you, people are like, “Oh my gosh! We need that!” I have loved working with couples on the emotional side of the process and seeing them be able to have the wedding they truly want, versus the wedding their parents, culture, society, religion, or tradition says they should have, and helping them think outside of the box and explore options to really make it their own.

Is your wife involved with the business at all?

She’s a big support, but no (laughs). She supports me emotionally.

What are some future goals you hope NearlyWed Coaching achieves?

That’s a really good question. I would love to reach more couples, specifically with the wedding coaching service. Like I mentioned, it’s just something that a lot of people aren’t aware of that exists, and I think everyone could use it on some level. I really want to support couples in that way. Then with the officiating and premarital coaching, the finishing piece is very much about building a relationship with a couple and helping them create an intention of ceremony. I believe there’s some stigma in society around not focusing on the ceremony and focusing more on the party itself or how the wedding looks.

The ceremony is the core of why you’re here and why you’re getting married. The party and everything else is amazing, but it’s like, “Why are we really here?” Then, of course, I want to continue connecting with the queer community and support them because queer folks continue to experience discrimination, feel un-welcomed, and they feel like they have to guess if their vendor is inclusive or not. Also, a fourth service I am now providing is inclusivity consulting for vendors, working with vendors to help them evaluate how inclusive they’re being and how they can do it even more, but from a very authentic place.

Honestly, I would love to work with couples that can do all three services. I can work with you as your wedding coach, helping you create an intentional wedding from an emotional standpoint, managing those conflicts as they arise, then do premarital coaching to strengthen your relationship, and then I can officiate your wedding and help you build a meaningful wedding. I have had some couples that have done multiple services, and I think it’s been very impactful for them. We build a strong relationship, and they feel comfortable with me, so it makes sense for me to officiate their wedding after that work!

Before we wrap up, is there anything else you would like to mention or plug?

I am just very grateful for this opportunity. I love OUT FRONT Magazine; I’ve always been a big fan, and like I said, it’s important for me to reach out to the queer community and let them know there is a space for them. This is a big mission and passion of mine, and I want to be able to support folks who are navigating through an industry that is not always the most supportive to them.

For more information and to connect with Stein, follow NearlyWed Coaching on Facebook and Instagram @nearlywedcoaching, or visit nearlywedcoaching.com.

Photos courtesy of Jay Begay Photography