American Queer Life: The Queer’s Gambit

You’ve got your mother in a whirl cause she’s

Not sure if you’re a boy or a girl

“Rebel Rebel” – David Bowie (1974)

I loved The Queen’s Gambit (who knew chess could be so sexy?) and its switch-a-letter, double-entendre. Which got me to thinking, admittedly weirdly, while a gambit is an opening chess move, it’s also a maneuver to gain advantage or a remark to open a conversation. So then coming out—wait for it—is the queer’s gambit. (Work with me here.) We seek to gain the advantage of living truthfully by having conversations, first with ourselves and then with whom we choose. But an unexpected result attaches to us: We become associated with the sexual politics of this nation. Whether we want to be or not, whether we know it or not, we are rebels. I like it.

Because when queers come out—damn straight (!)—we rebel. We say: “This is me. I deny your self-proclaimed authority to tell me what I can do with my body and with consenting adults. I will not obey your laws that seek to dictate my choices, and I do not accept your standards of ‘normal’ behavior or dress or belief. This is none of your business. So buzz off!” That’s a rebel, baby. 

Rebels created the U.S. of A., as we celebrate our 245th Independence Day, I celebrate my 49th. Coming out is our personal declaration of independence, our personal pursuit of happiness. Coming out is a political declaration of defiance against people or institutions that would proscribe our uniqueness. 

This country was founded on the principles of ancient Judaic law and Christianity that were codified into our Constitution. Two verses from one chapter, Leviticus, dictated that queer love was immoral and deserving of death, sealing queer fate for millennia. By the mid-20th century, the so-called sodomy laws wove the illegality of LGBTQ behaviors and relationships into the fabric of everyday, American life. Unraveling their knots became crucial to regain our rights to live, work, and love which had been effectively negated.

Violations of privacy, the laws were confirmed as recently as 1986 in the Supreme Court case of Bowers v. Hardwick. Justice Byron White wrote in the majority opinion: “…to claim that a right to engage in such conduct [sodomy] is deeply rooted in this nation’s history and tradition or implicit in the concept of ordered liberty is, at best, facetious.” Amusement aside, Chief Justice Warren E. Burger concluded: “… to hold that the act of homosexual sodomy is somehow protected as a fundamental right would be to cast aside millennia of moral teaching.” He then lumped homosexual conduct with adultery, incest, and other sexual crimes. 

The millennia of moral teaching were finally cast aside in Lawrence v. Texas when the Supreme Court struck down a Texas anti-sodomy law. Finally, male homo-sex was legal. That was in 2003—2003! 

Queers have lived in every ancient civilization from Africa, Asia, and Arabia to the Indigenous peoples of the Americas. Sappho and Plato, Greek writers of homo-expression and philosophy in the B.C. era, were intrinsic to Western civilization. Queer relationships and behaviors worldwide were both accepted and practiced with joy and fulfillment, also rejected and illegal with severe punishments. Like LGBTQ life today: Same-gender marriage is legal in many countries, yet in May, the Iranian Lesbian and Transgender Network “6Rang” reported that 20-year-old Fazeli Monfared had been killed by family members in an “honor killing.” The gay youth had been beheaded, his body dumped under a tree for his mother to find.

Hard to know what to say after that … but I’ll try. 

And I’ll try to keep my revulsion in check when I declare there are Civil War sword wielding forces in the U.S. who would gleefully embrace Iran’s Islamic laws regarding queers. January 6 proved that. Because to many right-wing conservatives, religious fanatics, and fake patriots, our very existence challenges their delusional beliefs. T o them, we are liberal perverts trafficking in sex with children. And then, we eat them. This from mad men and women wearing Cabela’s camo and ripe for a Queer Eye makeover? Only traitors believe this. They, and the ones who egg them on, disgrace and betray our country.

Deep breath … In the 70s when I came out, committing “an act of sexual and political rebellion” never crossed my mind. Hell, no! I wanted to go to a gay club and dance to The O’Jays and Three Degrees, Marvin Gaye and Gladys Knight. (Mostly, I just wanted to get laid.) 

But after I’d been out for a decade, society’s relentless persecution and disapproval angered and frustrated me. I was no longer willing to roll over. I became proud of my “deviance.” Because if being “normal” in America meant behaving with hatred and judgment, then “deviant” behavior was at least kinder, more honest, and frankly, far more fun. After growing up a nice boy, good student, reverent Lutheran, always chipper and never trouble, I loved becoming a rebel, and am now loving becoming a cranky, queer curmudgeon who suffers fools less and less every day. I like it.

So yeah, LGBTQ people are rebels. We are participants, active or passive, in the sexual politics of America. We have a responsibility in the present to be involved in our communities, to speak up in our relationships, to call a hypocrite a hypocrite, to vote. As previous generations made our paths easier, let us ease the paths for future generations. A queer’s gambit doesn’t end after coming out.