Aging is a Drag: A Chat with One of Denver’s Most Iconic Queens

Kenneth Stallings sat in the dining room of his cozy two-bedroom apartment, nestled in Cap Hill, Denver’s gayborhood. As another day’s sun set behind the Rocky Mountains of Colorado, Stallings sat a table covered in makeup that lay in wait with one singular and designated purpose: to layer on a mask of grandeur. Foundations and primers, eyeshadows and blushes, glitters and finishing powders, all lined in a row.

The transformation into Felony Misdemeanor has been perfected—yet again. She is then out the door, ready to embody her long-serving throne of Denver’s drag royalty. Voted Denver’s Best Drag Queen, Stallings is no stranger to the routines and rituals of this life. With the never-ending pressure of youth and urgency of remaining relevant in a world of novelty, Stallings is slaying the game.

“I’ve been performing 17 years; I’ve been doing this a long time,” Stallings said with a bit of exasperation.
On the eve of his 43rd birthday, he shared how he got his start as a drag queen in El Paso, Texas, on an accidental whim. While working at a gay bar, he was approached by the manager one evening to fill in last-minute for a no-show queen. He hadn’t hit the stage since a high school talent show, but decided to give it a try. His manager suggested a drag go-to performance when he told him, “Do Janet (Jackson); I want you to do Janet!”

“I didn’t do Janet; I did Missy Elliot. That’s where my name comes from,” he said with a laugh.
Stallings described the early days of Felony, and how everything about drag was different and challenging.
“Nowadays, it’s a fad. But back then, you were in it,” he explained. The community was hidden, kept safely underground. “You had to eagerly seek it out; you had to really want to do drag.”

“They didn’t have clothes readily accessible, and the clothes were not cute,” he scoffed. “The (new queens) just see the glitz and glam of it; they don’t know how hard it was.”

Dresses two sizes too big were purchased from department stores in secret. Most queens would sew and embellish their own costumes, however, Stallings admitted he wasn’t the best with a needle and thread. Instead, he discovered another trick.

“A lot of hot glue, girl. I’m good with a hot glue gun.”

Through his hard work over the almost two decades of drag life, Stallings marked some tremendous milestones. He has traveled the country, in 2016 was named Denver’s Best Drag Queen by Westword, and performed on stage at Red Rocks Amphitheater in 2017 as opening act for the Film on the Rocks screening of Priscilla, Queen of the Desert. He’s also a regular performer at Drag Nation and one of the best judges of Track’s Ultimate Queen Competition.

“I hate to say this,” Stallings admitted, “but I’m at a point in my career where people reach out and ask me to perform. But, I’ve worked hard.”

His humility doesn’t dismiss the fact that he has gotten to this point for a reason. However, all of the success doesn’t lessen the pressure to keep things fresh for every show. Multiple hours a week are spent on choreography and creating new characters.

“Queens judge each other. You better not have the same show on Sunday that you had on Tuesday, is all I’m saying,” he warned.

Over the years he has seen the trends change, but unlike any previous generation, the current struggle is staying relevant.

“They wanna see the young kids nowadays; it’s keeping up with the Joneses.”

Tanner Wade, friend of Stallings, has witnessed how hard it is for a queen to age in the industry. “Things can get nasty,” he admitted, “and age is an easy thing to make fun of.”

Before, a young queen would pursue a relationship with an older drag queen as a mentor, a drag mother. The mother/daughter exchange was the most important of all. A veteran queen’s name would act as a stamp of approval, the community would accept or reject the daughter based upon it.

That role has all but been eliminated now, technology and social media are to thank and to blame. In 2018, anyone interested in trying drag can purchase outfits by shopping online. Makeup tricks are easy to come by with a simple browse through thousands of tutorial videos on YouTube. Tips and tricks that were once a necessary passing down of the lineage are now an antiquated practice.

So, what makes Felony able to survive the pressure, the fight against the clock of becoming yesterday’s news? Dynamic stage presence and persona? Tenacity and hustle? The sheer love of performing? Yes, to all of the above, but mostly because of who Felony is as a performer.

“She’s not arrogant; she’s kind; she’s nice,” his friend Wade sincerely said. “I’ve met a lot of other queens that are full of themselves, feeding an image they need to create. Felony doesn’t need to do that; she’s just herself.”

While Felony plays a lot of divas, Stallings isn’t one at heart, and knows at the end of the day what is most important. He has a close bond with his family, a long list of faithful friends, and a strong sense of self. And, above all else, after all the years of putting on the character of Felony, he still loves every moment of.

“I love the spotlight; I love performing,” he said, glowing. Though the struggles of age and relevancy do exist, this queen has no plans of letting a number drag her down any time soon.