Meet the Maker: TK of Bond Intimates

In the realm of fetish, kink, dominance, and submission, the stakes can be high, but the reward can be even higher. Exploring sexual fantasies can incite feelings of naughtiness as communication swirls around desire while the imagination gets flooded with images of passion and pleasure. Having a propensity for play, many enter physical places and emotional spaces as a way of expanding the mind and getting into the body. Rope drunk, as they call it, is one of those experiences that many know very well when it comes to the erotic art and dance of Shabari bondage rope practice. 

For TK, a skilled rope creator, practicing the art of Shabari and acro yoga is a discipline that took him years to develop. Exploring the way the body moves amid the technical structure of knots and ties, he is a well-versed top and derives pride and satisfaction in everything that combines his love of the practice with inviting others to play. Treading the line of sexual escapade and wellness education led TK to the obvious, next step.

Starting his own rope refining business, Bond Intimates, sees TK delivering handmade, cared-for, quality products that also encompass education, encouragement, and intention. Removing intimidation and making the art of Shabari accessible, TK wants people to safely travel through the world of restraint confidently, eliciting excitement, joy, and eagerness. Discover how TK got immersed in bondage, how the creation of Bond Intimate creates a safe way for others to explore their own fantasies, and why he is passionate about showing us all the ropes.

How did you get introduced to Shabari bondage?
It was actually through my acro yoga community, and I spent my first two years experimenting and exploring. Some people you work with in the acro community are really flexi people, and when you combine restriction, it ends up being a really good tool to access the whole body and get a much deeper stretch. That was where I really developed my understanding of how rope works and how it works with the body, in particular the sensations and experiences that a partner might go through when they’re in the ropes.

How do you create the ropes for Bond Intimate and what do you love most about it?
I source it from a European company that’s been producing rope for 350 years, and it comes to me in this big spool, sort of raw form. And then I take that and treat it by working it against itself, oiling it, waxing it, baking it, and cutting it to good, usable lengths. Making sure that it feels nice, it looks good, and is strong. 

There’s sort of an inherent kind of beauty to the process. It’s that process of doing it all with my hands, getting that work out on my calluses, feeling every single piece of that rope. Somebody is going to be putting on their most cherished thing in the world, their partner, so making sure that it’s soft and strong so they have what they want to create the experience. 

What is the first rule when it comes to bondage?
Consent is critical to be able to participate in this type of practice, and that’s an important part to have of both parties. Sometimes, there’ll be a bottom who wants to do something with me that I don’t quite feel comfortable doing, whether it’s because I don’t know exactly what they mean by what they’re trying to describe, or there’s a safety concern, or I just don’t think that the person quite knows exactly what they’re asking for. If you don’t know what you’re getting into then how can you possibly consent to it?

What do people need to consider when they are beginning bondage play with rope?
That’s all going to depend on what type of rope play you’re specifically doing. You’re introducing something new into your sex life, and that can be super fulfilling and a satisfying, intimate exploration. Some people can have very, very powerful experiences that happen, whether it’s bringing up past trauma, or they’re feeling really empowered all of a sudden, or they’re feeling something that they hadn’t felt in a long time. Those, to me, are the most special and significant kind of moments; I’ve had bottoms breaking out into tears, and I say, ‘Oh shit, is everything OK? Do you want to stop doing this?’ And they say, ‘No, I’ve just been trying to work through something, and I feel like I just worked through it.’ It can be therapeutic.

What are some things to do to make sure everything is done safely?
If you’re doing suspension stuff, there’s all sorts of considerations to have. You can have issues with nerve damage if things aren’t done appropriately. Also, just a line snapping can be catastrophic, so make sure that all your equipment’s good, and that you know what ties that you should be doing, how to do them appropriately, and how those are going to actually impact the maximum load that the rope itself can bear.

If somebody is going to be bottoming, then make sure to ask if they have EMT shears or emergency shears around, do they have a safety hook around, or some sort of way that, if you do need a bail on it, that you can get out? If the person doesn’t say yes, then I would honestly not tie with them, or be very, very cautious about what types of ties will be done. 

Bond Intimate offers education with every kit; why is that component important to you?
It’s really important to at least have a good, fundamental kind of educational base about what you’re getting into. A lot of folks see some cool stuff online–they see a cool picture, they see a cool video and want to be able to do that. When people get a kit, I want to make sure to sit them down and show them a couple introductory ties, point them in the direction of some really great, educational resources that exist out there, and make sure that they understand what they’re signing up for when getting into a real practice. 

Knowing what you don’t know is almost more important than knowing exactly what to do, because within that, it then informs how you establish the boundaries. It is super important to me because you don’t want anyone to have a bad experience and then just get turned off and never want to try it again.

What is the experience like for bottoms that you work with in your own practice?
It’s such a subjective experience, different for each person, but the most common thing that I hear is they felt very safe, very close, very connected, very excited, and turned on. It’s human-connection-adjacent experiences that they could kind of lump into one sort of sensation. There’s a term called rope drunk; it’s an experience that some people feel, typically after the play, sometimes within it, but it becomes more prominent once it’s through. It’s this sensation of being able to surrender and allow somebody in your physical, mental, and even spiritual space; a feeling of trust, connection, intimacy, and confidence. It’s kind of comparable to subspace.

Why do you love teaching others the art of Shabari bondage?
Everything that I try to do is to lighten the load of all the hassle and not-so-fun parts that I had to go through on my journey. I had a really hard time just finding decent rope to tie with, and when I got started, I was using some nylon rope from Ace Hardware. Also, there was a lot of attitude of, ‘Well, if you’re not paying me, fuck off,’ and there is still a lot of that, and it really frustrates me. I’m trying to make things accessible, open things up, and get good, high-quality products into people’s hands.  

It’s play; part of it is really trying to introduce that kind of play side to intimacy and sexuality. It kind of gamifies getting to know your partner; the stakes are still high because there is risk, but isn’t that the best? A lot of people really enjoy having some sort of challenge and sense of adventure. Through those types of experiences, it’s if not strengthening of the relationship, it’s very telling of where you are in the relationship.

Ninety percent of the people that are out there are not going to be trying to do big performances or whatever else, they want to add a little bit of extra spice to their love life. So, being able to be a guide and a resource on a student’s particular journey is what I really take a lot of pride in.