Cameron Hawthorn’s New Single Is an Ode to the Straight Ex

Gay country music star Cameron Hawthorn first burst onto the scene last year with his heartfelt song “Dancing in the Living Room,” accompanied by a video delivering the message that love is love. Now, he has a newly released single entitled “To Break Hers.” Featuring husky vocals and infectious melodies, “To Break Hers” details Hawthorn’s personal struggle of dating and coming out.

“There were so many moments when I could have ended it with this girl, but I just kept going, leading her to believe I was in love,” he said. “Looking back, I was 100 percent using that to hide and cover up what was really going on.”

Hailing from a small Kansas town, Hawthorn attributes his years of growing up in the Midwest to the authentic and honest storytelling found in his music. Additionally, he has a strong desire to show others that acceptance is possible in a musical genre not often associated with the LGBTQ community.

“To Break Hers” is off of Hawthorn’s upcoming EP set for release later this year, and OUT FRONT had the opportunity to learn more about it, as well as his experience and passion for the country music industry.Hi, Cameron! Thank you for taking some time to chat with me about your latest single, “To Break Hers.” Can you tell us more about the song’s concept and inspiration?
“To Break Hers” is really a personal song for me. I wrote it about a relationship I had before coming out, and this was a pretty serious relationship. Unfortunately, I felt like I knew pretty early on that it wasn’t going to last in the end, and of course, for more reasons than one, but one obvious reason. The song is kind of an apology in a way for stringing her along.

What do you hope listeners take away from the song?
That if anyone is out there going through something similar, or have been through something similar in their past, there is a line in the song, “time does lots of damage, way more damage than you think,” and I think it’s really true. The longer you drag something out and you’re not honest with yourself, you’re not only hurting yourself, but other people as well. So, I hope that’s the message people take away from it. Those who have been in similar situations, or those who have already been through it and still processing it.

Do you have any sort of relationship with the girl you are talking about in the song, or have you two completely broken all ties with each other?
We didn’t cut all ties. It’s funny because she’s actually best friends with one of my best friends. She actually texted me the other day, and I didn’t tell her or reach out to her about the song, but she texted me about the song and that she’s happy that we are both in place where we are both happy now. The silver lining is that this led us to a place where we are both happy.

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That’s great. I am happy that you two were able to maintain a friendship and move forward.
Yes, I am very thankful that she reached out. I am like that with any relationship in general. When I date somebody, and it ends, I always like to keep that line of communication because that person was important to me, and in some ways is still important.

What is the biggest advice you can offer to those who, like you said, are or have been in similar situations?
It’s so hard when you’re going through it. When you are in the midst of a relationship, there are blinders to a certain extent. You can’t see outside of it from a third-person perspective, but really center with yourself and figure out what you want. Even when you don’t know what you want, it’s better to take some distance to figure it out so you’re not hurting someone else in the process.

“To Break Hers” is also accompanied with a music video. Writing the song, shooting the video – how cathartic was the overall process for you?
It was very therapeutic. I remember sitting down to write this song, and I wrote it with my friend Lena Stone who is also an artist, and the words poured out. I have been processing it for quite some time, and then being able to write it was like the finishing touches of processing it. Then the music video was like another layer of that because in having to act out some of those scenes with the girl, it was like reliving some of those moments. Especially the breakup scene. The girl who was in it did an awesome job of really conveying that emotion, and it, like, made me stand in my tracks. Like, oh my god, this was real, and it just brought it all back. In a good way, though, because it is fully processed now. Have you always had a passion for singing and songwriting?
Yes, definitely. I went to school for acting, but music has always been my passion. I have always written, and I grew up playing the piano and guitar. Then, about towards the end of college was when I was studying acting, and I realized that I wanted to pursue music. That being myself and getting to tell stories was really what I was passionate about. Stories through song.

Out of all genres, what made you want to pursue country?
I grew up on country. It’s in my blood; it’s real. I love that it’s all about being honest and real, and that’s me. I feel like I also grew up watching the CMAs and listening to some of the classics, but also 90s country. All of my family is basically from Oklahoma, but I grew up in Kansas. My family lives in Texas now, and it just felt right. You know, it felt like that’s what came out of me and allowed me to really tell the story I wanted to tell.

The country music industry has been known not to be the best when it comes to LGBTQ people and views. How has your experience been?
It has actually been very positive. I have had nothing but positive experiences. I think the biggest, aside from putting out music publicly as a gay artist or gay man, going into it is a little nerve-wracking. Especially if the other writer is known to write with a lot of macho country dudes or whatever. That can be a little nerve-wracking. Honestly, every song and every write I have gone into, I put it on the table and say like hey, this is where I am; here’s what I want to write about. It’s been nothing but positive, so I am very thankful for that.

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Do you believe the industry’s views and opinions are changing?
I do. I think 2020 has been a really big year for LGBTQ artists, and even last year, too. I think it’s only going to get better the more exposure there is. I think that’s the best way for people to understand, and hopefully hear the actual honest and true stories of real humans that have gone through struggle. I think that’s what allows people to have open minds and hearts, and I think that’s happening.

What more would you like to accomplish with your career and platform?
So much! I have an EP coming out really soon, and I am very excited about it. Then the next thing I would want to focus on would probably be an album, and, of course, touring, but I don’t know what that’s going to look like with COVID and everything, but touring, playing shows, and actually connecting with people in a live setting is something that I really want to do. Beyond that, oh my gosh, I have dreams of playing at the CMAs and collaborating with the legends of country music. Those are dreams that I hope to achieve.

Is there anything else you would like to mention or plug before we wrap up?
Like I mentioned, the EP is coming out before the end of the year. I don’t have an exact date yet, but that should be coming soon, and I would say that is pretty much the big one.

For the latest news and announcements, follow Hawthorn on social media, or visit cameronhawthorn.com.

Photos Courtesy of Matthew Holler